Quotes

“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One is roots; the other, wings.”
–Hodding Carter

I think that this quote is really great, and helps to boil down many of the dilemmas we face as parents. What is the best way to provide both roots and wings for our children?

There are some obvious answers. For example, we need to teach them the importance of family, and respect, and any other values a particular family unit finds important (ie. cultural and spiritual roots). On the other hand, we also need to teach them how to be independent thinkers, and provide them with the tools they need to succeed in the world on their own.

In my opinion, these days many children are going without either roots or wings. We see quality family time decreasing due to hectic schedules. There is such a focus on grades that independent thinking is being lost in many of our schools. Many argue that classes that would greatly benefit our youngsters, such as ones in personal finance, are needed to help them avoid some of the financial mistakes parents made.

I think that although kids are pretty resilient, we need to be aware of what we can to as parents in developing both their roots and their wings. Would you agree or disagree?

“It is not giving children more that spoils them; it is giving them more to avoid confrontation.”
–John Gray

What a wonderful, concise quote! I agree 110%. These days, it is so easy for parents to avoid interacting with their children by providing them with toys and gadgets to keep them entertained. In addition, spoiling children with material possessions sends them the wrong message (as can be seen by the large cars and houses that are prevalent everywhere!).

This isn’t to say that we cannot give our children things, as mentioned in the quote. However, they need to appreciate these gifts and the hard work we put in as parents so that they can have these things. Also, helping our children distinguish between wants and needs is very important.

As parents, we also need to be role models for our children - how important are material possessions in our lives? How often do they see us giving away things to the less fortunate, or volunteering, or just taking the time to make a positive difference in another person’s life?

“Children are not casual guests in our home. They have been loaned to us temporarily for the purpose of loving them and instilling a foundation of values on which their future lives will be built.”
–Dr. James C. Dobson

Children are a lot of work. We provide them with shelter, food, clothing, and other essentials, but there is so much more to it. Showing our children love and affection every day is so important to their well-being and confidence. This isn’t to say that we need to spoil our children - for me, sometimes the best form of love is discipline.

For me, one of the hardest things as a parent is giving my kid the right foundation of values. There is the world that we want to live in, and reality. I want to teach my kid to be kind, but also not be taken advantage of. I want to teach him to love everyone, but to realize that there are some people that you need to be very careful of. These are the things that I grapple with on a daily basis.

He can always be sure that his parents will love him unconditionally though!